Monday, April 6, 2009

Hurrah! Freedom!

"And there were moments on that first night in this fetid little paradise when I prayed that in spite of all my secrets, I was somehow kin to every mortal man. Maybe I was not the exotic outcast that I imagined, but merely the dim magnification of every human soul. Old truths and ancient magic, revolution and invention, all conspire to distract us from the passion that in one way or another defeats us all.
And weary finally of this complexity, we dream of that long ago time when we sat upon our mother's knee and each kiss was the perfect consummation of our desires. What can we do in this Savage Garden but reach for the embrace that must now contain both heaven and hell: our doom again and again and again".

To all who have expressed concern toward my well-being after my last post, I appreciate the thought. I'm fine. Granted, I haven't yet caved and taken the sleeping pills, nor have I yet slept since the blackouts, and yes, I'm still exhausted, but I don't feel nearly as bad as I had.

My last paper is done, and with it, so too is my school semester! Sure, there are two exams left at the end of the month, but that's weeks away and I'm ready to write them tomorrow after all the work, reading and reviewing I've had to do just writing those monster-essays. Short stories, done. Poems, done. School until September? Fucking. Done. And with that, I think I'm going to be taking a break from that particular creative outlet, with a few exceptions, this blog included.
It's a strange feeling, not having that mounting stress on my shoulders anymore. It's renewing.
Now I'm only focused on making sure this summer is a memorable one. Last year was a huge disappointment and I was far too busy to really enjoy anything. We can't have a repeat performance of that, or I'll quite literally go insane. Well, ok, more out of my mind than I already am.

This bleak weather lately has everyone feeling down, but strangely, it hasn't been affecting me in the least. I suppose I'm so used to night-time and the dark that a few cloudy days doesn't really phase me, but even beyond that, I don't mind the rain like I used to.

The hermit days are dead and done.
And in the spirit of that, I'm excited for what's to come.

Also, never forget the classics. Some times just because it's in your past, doesn't mean it needs to be forgotten and certainly doesn't mean it can't still be enjoyed.

See you all at Foufs thursday.


christina d said...

FOUFS? what? crazy.

jav said...

it's an old dawson tradition, chrissy. You helped start it, remember? the thursday before easter at foufs!

Come out, it'll be fun.